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The 5 Most Important Mutual Understanding Questions to Ask Before Marry

A long marriage life doesn’t mean a happy and understanding married life, some couples those we know personally. Even we know some celebrity happy couples on various media, they too may have difficulties in many ways with their spouses, because of a lack of mutual understanding.

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Questions to Understand Each Other

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Every person, every individual has own way of thinking. Own style of leading life. From talking, walking or planning, even choosing outfits or food, we are different from each other.

And, that’s why we need an understanding relationship and situation.

Moreover, for a newly married couple, it can be challenging to adjust with each other. That’s why here I am with a few questions and my personal opinions to share with you.

However, I am not an expert in this field. But, still, you can continue reading to know my view.

At least, it can help you find a little of yourself.

You can study more by searching online as well.

At a glance, the questions are to know own manner and for mutual understanding.

  • Do you understand yourself?
  • Do you understand well your going-to-be partner? 
  • Do you express gently to your going-to-be life partner about all of your demands? 
  • Do you understand what your partner-to-be says? 
  • Can you guess what is the next step you and your partner going to take in action? 

From these very ordinary questions, let’s find out the indication to bring some changes, if necessary. And, to develop more, personally.

Do you understand yourself?

Ok, this is the first question you got to ask yourself. You need to have a clear idea about your all the acts. At home, at the workplace or at an eating place, even in public transport.

How do you behave with the people and what do you expect in return. Or expecting something or behave or praising from others but without telling what you want.

You need to understand well about your desires, your target achievement, your job, and career. And, these all affect in family life with a spouse. With others too.

Your emotion, temper and angriness, kindness, humanity, also keeping relation with all other people. These all about your personal but surrounding with others.

In this world you’re either growing or you’re dying, so get in motion and grow.
― Lou Holtz

As the quote above, you can guess, that if you need any changes in yourself, it’s time to start and do.

And, grow to have a better life.

Marriage is a relation, a status, a responsibility that need mutual understanding. If you think you are doing all correct, and your spouse is not understanding. Then you need to create the situation and help your partner to grow personally.

Do you understand well your going-to-be partner? 

In case, you both know each other for quite a long time, at least, it’s not about a day only. Then you both supposed understand each other.

How about you? Do you understand your going-to-be spouse well?

Do you know her well?

I am talking not about the name, address, job or physical look.

Literally, to know someone, need time. And, investment in understanding, the mutual relationship.

And, it’s possible.

Be patient with yourself. Self-growth is tender; it’s holy ground. There’s no greater investment.
― Stephen Covey

What's her/ his thoughts, likes, philosophy of life, and these are very common matters you need to discover to have a nice conjugal life.

Do you express gently to your going-to-be life partner about all of your demands?

I consider, you have regular meeting and visits, or seeing each other frequently. And, also you both are having a nice understanding situation.

But, my question is, do you express your needs, your thoughts to your partner and expect a quick response without realizing the practical situation or his/ her.

Do you express gently? Or rough or as a bossy manner?

You need to understand yourself well, also, you need to understand your going-to-be partner.

We become each and every piece within the game called life!
- Allan Rufus, The Master's Sacred Knowledge

And, to have a happy life, take initiatives, also some you need to discuss well. And, if you are having a hot temper and express yourself badly.

It's better you change to be soft.

By hurting you can’t expect peace and love.

Do you understand what your partner-to-be says?

Now the next question is very important to set up mutual understanding. If you fail to understand your partner well, the problem may arise.

You need to research much to know enough your future spouse. As you know, everybody is different in many manners. And, that is the uniqueness of human character.

And, to understand you need the heart and feeling, and try to catch the flow of your partner’s nature.
The result will be good if you both spend the time to understand each other.

Only then, you will know, what your partner wants to say.

Your inner strength is your outer foundation
― Allan Rufus

Can you guess what is the next step you and your partner going to take in action?

The answer to this question is simple. And it is the result as you both are building the relationship and mutual understanding.

In case, you both are responding together when need as the situation arises, in the same manner.
It proves, that both know each other’s next step well.

If you don't have peace, it isn't because someone took it from you; you gave it away. You cannot always control what happens to you, but you can control what happens in you.
― John C. Maxwell, Be a People Person

From this discussion, I hope, you have an idea now that “understanding’ is a process.
And, it depends on willingness.


  1. This is excellent information which is shared by you. This information is meaningful and magnificent for us to increase our knowledge about it. Keep sharing this kind of information. Thank you. sri lankan matrimony


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